Get that one out of the way

The first time I do something I am often surprised at how badly I do it. I'm not sure if this is arrogance or ego. I assume I can be good at things first time round.  

What I have learnt is that the first time is bound to be poor. It isn't about quality. It's about learning.  

For example I took my kids to the snow yesterday. I had no idea the ordeal this would become. But we all learnt so much. We all want to come back one day. And the kids got a taste, feel and smell of something new. 

Extra-cirricular

What if by the time my kids are 25 it is discovered that team sport is a horrible thing put kids through?

This is probably unlikely. However I am going through a process of trying to work out what extra stuff kids do? My kids do swimming lessons (although sometimes they are not too keen), play in a basketball team, and have done some soccer. What are the skills that are most important for them to develop? 

Here are a few categories:

Necessities

• Swimming basics so they can have fun in the water and not drown

Good for coordination

• Martial arts
• Dance
• Gymnastics
• Music lessons
• Team sports?

Good for creativity

• Dance
• Circus
• Music lessons
• Lego?

Good for socialisation / team work

• All of the above?

Not sure that helps me that much. I think my rule of thumb will be, if the kids are into it and it is not add stress and cost to my life I don't want, then they can participate. Otherwise it is a no go.

When tattslotto seems like the answer

I sometimes find myself dreaming about winning the lottery. I find it very hard to ignore what I could do with a $30M windfall. The thing that stops me buying a ticket is not actually the overwhelmingly poor odds. The thing that stops me is that I find myself asking the question, 'But what if I won?', and not liking the answer.

What would happen to my life? What would I miss out on learning? How would my sudden change of fortune change the way I am with people?

It seems like it would be a short cut to have all the finances I want right now. I would be able to launch my breath mint business. I would be able to design a build a family home. I would be able to push my podcast to be a revenue generating venture. But the fact is that right now I have all the finances I need to do the things I need to do. I have enough to send my kids to school, to buy food, to pay the rent, to start the businesses. A large influx of cash would not actually push forward my current ventures in a sustainable way.

What I think I am craving when I fantasise about winning the lottery is not having to go through the uncertain times I know are ahead: the times of wondering how it will turn out; the times of feeling uncomfortable; and the times of feeling like I am out on a limb all by myself.

And it is these feelings and living through them that are actually the marrow of life. They can't be purchased with any amount of money, and ironically money can actually rob us of the opportunity to have these experiences and learn these lessons. 

Right now I move forward knowing that I have everything I need. And when the temptation of a $30M jackpot is too much to resist, luckily the odds are stacked against me.

Laundry List Item 33: All important decisions must be made on the basis of insufficient data

I have a decision to make. The details will be a little boring for many, and probably interesting for a few. It is about the school I send my kids too.

They currently go to a private, co-ed, primary school in a wealthy Melbourne suburb. The boys are happy there. The teachers seem nice. I don't have a problem with what they are being taught academically. My problem is with what they are being taught spiritually and the implicit cultural traits they are picking up on from the community that surrounds the school. 

My greatest desire for the boys is that they build the awareness to listen to themselves, the courage to act on what they hear, and the skills to execute well when they do act. My concern with the school they are going to is that while they will definitely develop some of the skills to execute well (for example reading, writing, maths, sport), they are not going to develop a clear understanding of who they uniquely are, nor are they going to have the courage to live out this truth. They are going to be more likely comparing them self to some external, false ideal of a person, building the same skills that everybody says they should, and think they have to do what everybody else is doing.

There are two other schools I am looking at that would seem to meet the three criteria. Based on what I have written it would seem like a no-brainer. However there are other factors running through my head, like cost, location, and disrupting the boys. 

Location can be solved through moving house, which I don't have a problem in doing, although the grandparents may object! Cost is a matter of deciding what I expect to be earning, and whether this is a good investment for the kids (as opposed to taking them overseas throughout their childhood). And I think disruption is better earlier on in school rather than later.

I have limited knowledge to make this decision. I don't know what the future will hold. I don't know what the school will be like on a day to day basis. I don't know how my boys will react to change. All I can do is evaluate and decide using the information I have available to me.

And that is what I shall do.