Heroes

In Australia ANZAC day (which was yesterday) is a national holiday where we commemorate those Australian soldiers who have serve the country in times of war, and particularly those who lost their lives in doing so.  

Although both my grandfathers served during World War II, I have had trouble embracing and understanding what this day is about. It could be because I have had difficulty understanding the purpose of the wars fought by my country during my life time. The Great Wars I can see were important to fight, and the outcomes seem to be positive. The Gulf Wars to me did not seem as important or necessary, and the outcomes negative. 

Then I read something recently that got me thinking about what a hero was. As I understand it, a hero is somebody who incurs personal disadvantage, or risks doing so, for the good of others. In my context this a notion not celebrated or encouraged outside of the battle field (with perhaps the exception of sport), and outside this realm heroes are often called failures and mistakes rather than acknowledge for making heroic sacrifices. 

So this ANZAC day I want to remember the heroes that I see, and don't see, around me: 

• those who have fought in wars and served this country, sacrificing themselves for those of us who did not fight, regardless of whether the wars seemed important or necessary, or whether the consequences have been positive or negative
• anybody who has put their life at risk for another, sometimes meaning the loss of their life
• those who speak out fearlessly about the fraud they see, often to their personal ridicule and detriment
• those who choose lower paid jobs across their career in order to serve society, sacrificing status and comfort and material for the improvement of others
• to those who invest their money in low probability experiments, understanding that they may never see a financial return, but in doing this work we all learn something and have the opportunity to benefit

I know it is difficult to compare losing a life to losing quality of life. But I think that a hero can take a number of forms, and for those who take this on I admire.  

Laundry List, Item 4: We are already dying, and we'll be dead a long time

There is a song that my friend introduced me to a few weeks ago called 'Say' by John Mayer. The song is about saying the thing you need to say, and it being better to say too much than to say nothing at all.

The song speaks to me of honest expression, something I have struggled with most of my life. I often feel like my thoughts are dangerous, and that if I express them people will run from me. I am slowly understanding that allowing ideas and thoughts to flow through me and out of my mouth in an honest way helps to build authentic connection with others, normalising the reality of living for myself and those I talk with.

This is the moment to do the thing I think I need to do. This is of course after giving it some consideration; its not about being reckless. But once I know that something needs to be done, something needs to be said, to say it. If it is not said, then it creates a tension in my body where that feeling is held, and the relationship with the person I need to talk with stalls. I am stopping the next thing from unfolding in a timely manner.

We will be dead a long time, and we have a limited number of moments. Each moment is important. There are no ordinary moments. There is no need to save something for a later moment, because it will have its own awe when it arrives.

I commit to summoning the courage to say the things I need to say in the moment they need to be said.