some of my thoughts
I write a little. Some of this is old and some of it new. I think my thinking has evolved over time.
No going back
When I am in a rut, or going through the thrash, I often find myself thinking 'I need to find a way to get back to where I used to be'. Nostalgia of an earlier time, when I meditated with more depth, was fitter and happier, and felt more connect to others, come flooding into my memory.
As I hit these inevitable periods where my life seems to be shaken up, I am starting to learn that they are a necessary part of my growth. There is no going back; there is only going through, and going forward.
The thrash I am working through now is not because I need to return to old times and routines. They were for an earlier period in my life, and enabled me to get to this point of greater awareness and challenge. The thrash I am working through now represents something new, something that needs its own courage and patience and routines.
A while moving forward is important, I am encouraged when I look back to see that I have hit these periods of thrash before. That I have survived. That they did not last forever. And that I came out stronger on the other side.
Acknowledging the progress
Last night I did not have any plans, so I decided to make an effort and have a solo date. I went out for dinner and had a delicious, medium rare stake. I went to a new cinema I wanted to check out, and watched The Martian. I had a great night.
Although I am tired this morning from a late night, I have a feeling inside that I have marked the progress I have made over the past month. I have trashed about with mints, and now have a name, and plan for making a mint, and clarity on what the values of the business are. I have developed my podcast logo and website, conducting my first interview, and lined up a few more interviews.
This is great progress. Slow progress, yes. It is usually slower than I hope. But it will take as long as it needs to take, and when it arrives I will not remember or be disappointed in how long it took. And since it is will be some time before I can have that ultimate celebration, I will continue to celebrate the small steps along the way, even if I am doing so by myself.